Conflict Resolution: Receiving Feedback – Steve Beckow @ Golden Age of Gaia

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Conflict Resolution: Receiving Feedback

Sacred 333I’d like to begin a discussion of two things really: one is conflict resolution, and the other is growth-movement techniques of communication and conflict resolution, considered more generally. Again, we’ll need these after abundance hits us.

Suzi Maresca raised an interesting point the other day. She introduced the notion of “calling someone on their stuff” in an InLight Universal call.

That’s a growth-movement notion for not buying a person’s story but instead mirroring back to them what you see or think is happening. Usually the person is running a victim act, as we’d have said in the 1970s, and we don’t want to buy into it, as a matter of integrity. It led to a very useful exchange.

And it set me thinking. “Calling someone on their stuff” was used to get people to open up in an encounter group when time was limited (a weekend, a week). One member of the group called someone on something and away they’d go.

After the Reval, I think we’ll find that we’ll need conflict-resolution techniques.

Why after the Reval? The Reval will restore something to us we lost a long time ago: The experience of unfettered choice.

For some of us (me, for sure), that’ll let loose a volcano of suppressed childish desires, pent-up frustrations, vengeful thoughts, every bit of molten lava that’s been kept down for so long.

Why my concern? It stems from a spiritual experience I had several years ago, which I reported at the time. I was doing something ordinary when, totally out of the blue, the thoughts I was having, which were banal, were greatly magnified. I think I found a nearby woman attractive. When these thoughts were very largely, greatly magnified, I became a lascivious monster for about two seconds. And then the experience vanished.

It shook me to the core. It contained human history in one moment of time.  I was shown what it was like, in record time, to go from banal thoughts of sexual attraction to lascivious monster, to descend into the densest and darkest of realms. It was truly awful and shocked me.  I staggered when I came out of that experience.

So I look at the Reval tsunami with different eyes than many other people. I say to myself: “Steve, you should sound the warning bell. This is not going to be two seconds of unconsciousness. This is a life-changing event that people should prepare for, at least in their thinking, their intellectual knowledge.”

We’re looking at conflict resolution. In the absence of those skills, what we usually do is we (1) gunnysack (refuse to discuss things, while storing up resentment), (2) manipulate (try to coerce or trick someone into doing what we want since plain-out asking didn’t work), or (3) any other number, act, routine, racket, etc., that we have in our repertoires (see Eric Berne, Games People Play for more examples).

We’re devious, calculating, and selfish and nothing works. These are our Third-Dimensional paradigms and habits which we now need to shake.

If we lightworkers don’t shake them and don’t have a mechanism that allows us to raise issues with each other, we’ll probably end up going our own ways and not speaking to each other in fairly short order. It’ll be made shorter by the experience of abundance and choice.

We’ll hook up to stray thoughts like “I don’t have to put up with that stuff any longer.”  And the ones closest to us will likely feel the impact of our “newfound courage” first.

(Concluded in Part 2, below.)

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I’d like to suggest one conflict-resolution technique – and there are many others.

I suggest that we ask the person involved if they’d be willing to receive feedback from us.

If they agree, then the feedback would be phrased in either Perro (just the facts, ma’am; neutral) or Sedor (the language of transformative love), depending on what the speaker can manage.

If they don’t agree to feedback, at least we’ve identified that we have an issue. We got as far as we did in opening up communication instead of gunnysacking and manipulating. We’ve escaped, if even that much, from our old Third-Dimensional paradigms and habits.

To deliver feedback allows us to get a matter on the table and speeds the resolution of outstanding issues.  It’s one technique among many, I imagine, awaiting an energetic lightworker gathering them all together and publishing them so that we can have a conflict-resolution manual after the Reval.

Job Opening: Author, Manual of Conflict Resolution.

In my view, you and I need to agree that, as lightworkers, we accept the need for others on occasion to give us feedback as the first step in the conflict-resolution process. We need to accept that giving feedback isn’t a bad thing. It facilitates peace, harmony, and balance. If we don’t, we close the door on a tool that will be much-needed in our toolbox later on.

I suppose I can only speak for myself. I’m aware that one of the provisions of my soul contract is to contribute towards keeping the balance, keeping calmness, etc.  (I’m a Libran.) I know this from my readings with AAM.

Pillars like myself have agreed to stay till the end. While the ride is still going, we adjust our place on any teeter totter we’re on so that it stays level. We help to keep the ship from swaying and lurching. Later on, we help the last ones through the portal and turn out the lights. Very romantic.

In our line of work, we learn a lot about the balance point.  It’s in the center, in the heart.

The extremities of passion are fun but can be treacherous waters. The extreme needs to get ever more extreme to maintain our interest, until one has an accident or something else induces them to call it quits.

One tires of even passion after a while. One tires of most “earthly delights.” The world was designed, I’m told, such that nothing but God permanently satisfies.

If we have even a slight remembrance when the tsunami hits that, when conflict arises, it can be handled, that can prove our lifeline. We may then begin to read and consider how post-Reval conflict can be handled.

Otherwise, we’ll leave a trail of wrecked relationships, where wreckage was avoidable.

Conflict is manageable, most by communication; some by silence and a time-out.  A lack of real, genuine listening can be found to be at the root of a great deal of Third-Dimensional conflict. A great deal of our conflict therefore can be handled by us simply listening – for as long as is needed.

Those who’ve mastered conflict-resolution skills, I think, will be in high demand once lightworkers are given the means to break free of the chains of want and anxiety.