I’ve said that I believe that, for us humans, the most important thing to us seems to be how we feel.
It even overpowers how we think, in my opinion.
We don’t often put matters this way. We usually say we have a reason for how we feel and what we do. We may even talk about our philosophy being our prime motivator or our compassion for people, etc.
But the reasons and philosophy I think are secondary. First we act on the basis of how we feel and then we create the reasons.
I saw myself feeling really grumpy today and I watched that feeling dictate how I acted towards those around me. I was short and aggressive and ornery. And I saw clearly in the moment that there was no other reason for how I behaved other than that I felt grumpy. How I felt dictated what I did.
If I’m right in this, then it suddenly becomes important to pay attention to how I’m feeling, how I’d like to feel, and what I can do to alter how I feel towards that ideal. And I’d be well-advised to look at the means of feeling the way I want to feel. Gambling, stealing, hurting people are not good means of ending up feeling better.
Michael told me some time ago that I’d been neglecting drawing love up from my heart. Consequently the degree to which the heart is open was decreasing.
Given that that single act of drawing love up from my heart and sending it out to the world promises the greatest impact on the way I feel, why is it that I don’t do it all day – as much as possible, in every spare moment?
I distract myself with sensory and egoic pleasures all of which are turned to in the hope that they will … make me feel better. But they seldom succeed as strategies and they produce residue, complication, and disappointment.
Sensory and egoic pleasures are usually not deep enough to really touch and motivate us, except for such short-term activities as getting something to eat or going for a walk.
But really deep feelings can have us get over our fear and sign the Declaration of Independence or ride into the Valley of Death.
In the face of such deep feelings, our sensory and egoic pleasures are set off to one side.
Our thoughts are dismissed. We say we’ve “made up our minds.” Our deeply-felt feelings take precedence and decide the matter.
And yet, as I’ve said before, very few of us are consciously aware of how we feel. To the extent we’re unaware, we resemble stimulus-response machines rather than truly reflective and aware human beings.
Knowing how we feel is right up there in my scale of values with knowing how to listen. Both important skills, in my view, to navigate what awaits us as lightworker leaders.