Deepening My Experience of Love – Steve Beckow

Patriarch Zhanggong was worshipped as a healer and the Chinese village where he was known want the figure back (Image:


Deepening My Experience of Love

We use a metaphor that says that there are “higher” levels of existence, dimensions, and such.

But that view obscures an important aspect of what I’ve noticed.

Whenever I’ve delved into the Self or dived into love or bliss, the experience for me has been (A) one of going deeper, not higher, and (B) almost as if the thing I sought was, in the case of the Self, at the end of a long portal and tunnel. (1)

In my meditation on the Self at Xenia, Sept. 18, 2018 [9 + 9 + 9 +11] – I imagined myself in a one-hundred-floor elevator. (2)

I descended below superficial levels such as ego, personality, vasanas, and everything remotely connected to those surface levels of consciousness.

And even then I found myself, at the bottom of my descent, coming upon a tunnel which also went for some distance – before I came upon the Self.

I therefore had to go deeper and deeper and deeper. In none of it was the experience of going higher.

Here’s a second example. My life is a workshop and Love became the object of my experiments after the 2015 heart opening.

All the experiences of love that I had – “higher”-dimensional and everyday – could be more usefully arranged on an axis, with me in the middle, marked “deeper” than my everyday consciousness than on an axis marked “higher.”

It’s the same love at all levels, only experienced ever more deeply along the way.

I believe that’s why so many people laugh like they just struck it rich when they experience “higher”-dimensional love.  “Wahoo! This is it!” Their cares are swept away.

They’ve never experienced anything like this before and didn’t suspect it existed! I remember myself saying, “So this is what they’re all talking about!”

Here’s a third example. I no longer think that we go from one discrete level of enlightenment to another discrete level, with each level featuring something different, like a kaleidoscope.

I admit that one line of enlightenment experience has one see the Light of the Self, then the Light in all creation, and then the Light that transcends creation. (Heavens, I may be on that path!)

But one can see that path two ways. One can focus on the seeming difference in where the Light is seen or one can focus on a deeper experience of the Light – and the latter is what I focus on.

I now see us as diving deeper and deeper into the same One Ocean of Love. I’m not looking for variety. I’m looking to go deeper.

I can’t believe it’s taken me this long to say what I’m about to say out loud.   But I think it’s because mine sounds like a very male point of view.

I felt the need to penetrate the tunnel and merge with the Self /Love that I found in the deepest parts of my heart (the so-called seat of the Soul). I feel almost embarrassed saying that, it sounds so darned masculine. But there it is.

And after those experiences, I see myself as going deeper and deeper into Love, rather than higher and higher.

Our points of view bring consequences. One of them for me is that I don’t have an eye on dimensions or very much of an interest in them. I only have an eye on deepening my experience of love.

And of course, the Mother respects our free will. If I see the process as going deeper and deeper, she’ll make it be about going deeper and deeper. So there’d be no way to prove my assertion, except to say that that’s how it is for me.

Still another perspective – and another path arising out of it? Why not. The paths to God are infinite.

The world is a hall of mirrors, each one reflecting back the One.  We’re in that hall of mirrors, wondering what it is we’re doing here. (3)

What we’re doing here is pondering the reflections, remembering who we are, emerging from the hall of mirrors, and helping the rest of the world to do the same. I’m doing that by diving deeper and deeper into Love.


(1) I came upon the Self consciously, going deeper. The heart exploded in the experience of opening so I did not directly initiate that experience.

(2) In my numerological scheme, “2” usually devolves to “11,” the master revealer of truth.

The sight of the Self as if it were an object (dualistic), as occurred on Sept. 18, 2019, is a characteristic fourth-chakra enlightenment experience.

The opening of the heart, as occurred on March 13, 2015, given that the kundalini reached the fourth chakra, is also a fourth-chakra experience.

This proves that it’s possible to repeat the same level of enlightenment experience. It isn’t necessarily the case that one goes, say, from fourth to sixth to seventh only, in strict sequential order.

I also know someone who had a sixth-chakra experience without apparently having had a fourth.

I should add that I don’t often meditate. Usually when I do, I drop pretty quickly. Michael has said that meditation is not required of me in this lifetime:

Archangel Michael: You did not come to live as a guru in a western or eastern manner and so that is what was meant by that comment.  Part of your and part of our recommendation to you is to play, to laugh, to enjoy, to be physical, so that you are anchored in the physical reality – because you are here to be a transition point and to be able to show people how to do both.

If you were completely involved in your full awakening, you in very great likelihood would not be forming a platform with me.  You would be off somewhere in an ashram meditating.

So that is what we have meant.  Ground yourself.  Be human and love the experience of being in form.

SB       OK. Boy. Eat, drink and be merry!

AAM    It is difficult, no?

SB       Yes, it is difficult.  (Archangel Michael in a personal reading with Steve Beckow through Linda Dillon, May 6, 2013.)

For a monk!

(3) Wondering why you’re here? See “The Purpose of Life is Enlightenment – Ch. 13 – Epilogue,” at


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