Easy to Find
I have often looked inside my drawers
without knowing why.
Something called out.
Seek me and you shall find,
but when I obey
I’m confounded by memory’s fleeting ways.
Hands immerse and return awkwardly empty
like a runaway child
when no one came after them.
I know there is something I seek
that hides from me so I can’t think about what I lack.
It is, however, and this is the point,
too damn powerful to be silent and still.
Besides, I know I lack it because I miss it.
I miss it.
Whatever “it” is.
Whatever I need it to be it is not that.
It can never be anything but what it is.
And so I search in drawers and closets absent of why,
driven like a machine whose switch has been thrown
just because it can.
I miss it.
I wish it could find me.
Maybe I need to stay put long enough for it to do so.
Now there’s a switch.
Let the powerful “it” seek me out.
But for how long must I wait?
And how will I recognize it should it find me?
There must be names
for this condition that end in
Damn, I hate that suffix.
It all starts with a sense of wonder
and ends in a sense of emptiness.
God, I wish you could find me here.
I’ll tuck myself in a little drawer
right out in the open.
I won’t bury myself under incidentals.
I’ll be right on top.
Easy to find.
Do you need me for anything?
I hope so because I need you for everything.
I have so little experience
that I often think myself small.
Yet when I think of you
and your luminous ways
my being swells with hope and prayers
that you will permit the flames to grow.
In mercy, we are torn apart
into separate worlds
to find ourselves over and over
a thousand times aching for the other half.
To dream of nothing but the One between us.
Of luminous things I have squandered none
nor have I held them to my heart and asked them
to dissolve into me.
Yet when I think of you, I desire only this.
And if you disrobed your Self and watched it
watch you, you would see me as clearly as I am.
Not small and unworthy.
Unafraid of fear.
Not uncertain like empty space.
like white light before the prism.
In my thoughts I hold your heart
sculpting away the needless
for the essence.
And when I find it
I will hold it to my heart and ask it
to dissolve into me.
I will know of luminous things
that hurtle through time
bringing us the uncharted, unfathomable
desire we have never spoken.
Words are not curious enough to say their names.
Only love can weep their identity,
and I am so perfectly defenseless
to its music.
Perhaps the best way to understand James Mahu and his role in bringing this work to realization,
is to read, in his own words, how he explains his role. The following quote is an excerpt from the
Author’s Preface in the Collected Works of the WingMakers Vol. 1.
“I have said before that this was a commissioned work. That is to say, I was asked to produce
these materials by an energy field I met when I was a young child. I call it an energy field because
I had, at the time, no other way to describe the WingMakers. Over the years, I grew to understand
their intelligence and creativity, and ultimately their purpose and how it was linked to my own, and
by extension, to each of you who are reading this.
“I was given visions of this work when I was yet in my early teens and I could see that its trajectory
was not concerned with the production of a text-based treatise. It would require multiple forms of
content and technology to include visual art, mythological storytelling, music, poetry, video,
philosophy, and ultimately a global community that could embellish these works with its own
perspectives and insights.
“However, regardless of the many layers, complexity, and scope of these works, there remains a
core essence, and this essence is spiritual equality. This is the equality that is found in the deepest
layers of the human heart, living free like a mountain stream—uncrystallized and unconformable
by social programming or even human experience. You could call this quality of equality many
different names. In my own work I’ve endeavored, and, in some cases, struggled, to name it, define
it, describe it, compose it or paint it.
“This quality of wordlessness and imagelessness is its real essence. How it has survived over thousands
of years of persecution by those who would try to own it, enslave it and make it into something it is
not, is proof of how carefully it is protected by those who would have you enlightened by its existence.
In part, because it is unseen and unspoken, this spiritual equality runs through the DNA of all life as
its template of existence—its distillation or quantum essence. It is what survives all time-forms and
though it is hidden in the mundane, it is expressible. It can live in our actions. It can have force in our
lives. It can become us.
“The beauty of this inexhaustible essence is that we—living as human beings—orbit around it like
planets to their solar centers. It is this essence that activates us to live a love-centered life and to
express the virtues of the heart into our local universe just as the sun expresses its light and energy
outward without condition. Spiritual equality is the activator of the highest frequencies of love on
“This essence or quality of equality is what is coming to this planet. We are all evolving into it, and it
into us, and not necessarily because we are consciously trying or because some all-powerful force is
orchestrating it. It is simply a natural outcome of the process that is designed into life. It is the design
of an intelligence that arises from our collective sovereign essence. We are all a piece of the design
whether we are conscious of it or not.”